Odd Man Out
by lemanruss96
Summary: The toughest bully in town takews on one of the toughest Covenant warriors. Set in the world of WordNerb93's Carpe Diem.


**This story is a spinoff of WordNerb93's Halo and Phineas and Ferb crossover. Don't expect anything to be canon.**

**Oh, and I own nothing!**

Buford and Baljeet slowly walked through the outskirts of Danville. Each of them was wearing the Spartan armor suits that Phineas and Ferb had made. They had asked that one guy Master Chief if they could have guns, but he had made it very clear that under no circumstances did he want them to even touch the firearms he had in his ship. Therefore, they were stuck looking for any civilians who needed to be evacuated.

"Buford, look!" Baljeet cried out, pointing up at the air.

"What is it this time, nerd?" Buford asked. He was getting annoyed with Baljeet's incessant worrying. All the aliens were miles away, fighting the Marines and other aliens that had shown up.

He looked up, squinting a bit. It looked like a shooting star, but it was getting bigger…

"Get down!" Buford yelled. He shoved Baljeet away as the Covenant drop pod landed.

The two of them had gotten behind what appeared to be a crashed alien motorcycle as shock wave hit them. Baljeet held on to the vehicle for dear life while Buford stood defiantly.

There was a loud _BLAM_ as the hatch on the pod blew off. Then, out stepped something that looked like a gorilla wearing golden armor. The Master Chief had told them about these. They were Brutes, known for their strength. Buford eyed it. Yeah, he could take it.

Turning back to the cowering Baljeet, he yelled "Get out of here, now! He's mine." The diminutive Indian was happy to oblige, running away as fast as his power armor could take him. Buford returned to the Brute.

XXXXXXXX

The Brute Chieftain observed its surroundings. It had hit some bad weather, so the pod had dropped it miles from the conflict. It grunted with annoyance as it picked up its fuel rod gun and prepared for the long walk.

"Hey, ugly! Yeah, I'm talking to you!"

It turned to face the creature that had foolishly dared to challenge it. What it saw was one of the human demons. It was a little shorter and broader than most, but regardless, it was a demon.

A toothy smile came to the creature's face. Should it kill the demon, its place in the hierarchy would skyrocket. The Brute calmly shouldered its gun and prepared to fire.

XXXXXXXX

Buford saw it pick up that gun and fire five shots towards him. He didn't back down. Rather, he pulled something off his belt.

The Master Chief had not been willing to give Buford or any of the other children a weapon, but he did give them some sort of glass-like cylinders. He had explained that they were drop shields, and would create a defensive barrier against whatever got shot at them.

Buford pressed the button on the top of the cylinder, and then hurled it down hard enough to shatter the container. A sphere of energy came into existence around him, and the rounds the Brute had fired impacted harmlessly against it, causing nothing more than a cloud of dust.

XXXXXXXX

The Brute grinned again. Nothing, not even one of the demons, could survive a salvo like that.

Its mistake became apparent as the demon came charging out of the dust, faster than it thought possible. Before it could even react, the demon was right in front of him and had delivered a massive punch to the Brute's jaw.

XXXXXXXX

Buford couldn't help but grin as he punched the Brute. It hadn't even seen it coming. The Brute's head snapped backwards and it took a couple of steps back. The blow had obviously caught it off guard, and it had paid dearly.

The Brute looked at Buford with murder in its eyes. It dropped its now empty fuel rod gun and pulled the massive hammer off its back.

"Come on. Come at me!" Buford yelled, hitting his chest. The Brute let off a roar of frustration and came charging at him, swinging the hammer.

Buford ducked the first swing. The second, he merely rolled aside. The Brute roared again. It was enough to slow down Buford, and the Brute took full advantage of it, delivering a titanic blow to Buford's chest.

Buford went flying backwards, going a good twenty feet before he came to a rest. That hit had hurt; he felt some new bruises coming into existence on his abdomen, and the little bar thingy on the top of his visor was blinking empty. Yeah, he probably shouldn't take another hit like that one.

The Brute gave him no chance to rest. It swaggered its way forward, obviously very proud of itself. It then jumped up, holding its hammer high above its head, ready to deliver the final shot. It brought it down with every ounce of force it had.

Buford narrowly caught the hammer just a few inches from his face. The Brute tried to force it down, while Buford tried to push it back. Neither side was winning; Buford had power armor built by one of the best engineering teams in the nation, while the Brute had sheer musculature.

Finally, Buford saw an opening. He shoved the hammer as hard as he could to the left while letting go. The Brute smashed the hammer on empty ground, causing no further damage to Buford's armor. Meantime, Buford got up and adopted a classic bully-style fighting stance.

"You gonna actually try this time?" Buford asked.

"RRRAAAAUUUGGGHH!" was the reply. The Brute dropped its now-damaged hammer and charged.

The two of them clashed in a fierce volley of blows. Again, they were almost completely equal, with neither side gaining a significant advantage. Finally, the two stepped apart, each panting.

"Buford? Buford?" the voice of Phineas crackled in his ear.

"What? I'm kinda in something important," Buford replied as he deflected a left hook.

"Okay. In any case, Baljeet told us what you're doing…"

"Idiot. Taking a Brute on without a gun," he heard the Master Chief say in the background.

"And in any case, we figured you could use some backup," Phineas continued.

"What kinda help?" Buford asked, suspiciously. He then noticed a shadow coming over his shoulder. He turned around. "Oh. That kind of help."

XXXXXXXX

The Brute was very annoyed. Its attempts to kill the demon had all been unsuccessful, and now he had to face it without even its hammer. Things could not get worse.

Suddenly, it became aware of a shadow looming over it and the demon. Looking, it saw some sort of massive, four-legged creature it had never seen before. It has a large muzzle full of razor-sharp metal teeth, triangular ears, and a rather short tail. To add to that though, it had the gun that humans use on their Warthogs mounted on its back. And it was being ridden by two demons, one of which was at the gun.

The metallic creature growled. The Brute ran. Even it could tell this fight was lost.

XXXXXXXX

Buford looked up at Phineas and Ferb's old robotic dog. The two figures on it jumped off and removed their helmets, revealing themselves to be Isabella and Ferb.

"Nice timing," Buford grumbled. "Only ten minutes and an epic fight late, but good timing."

Isabella shrugged. "Hey, we would have been on time. But someone couldn't just dismount the machine gun from the Warthog and carry it like a regular person."

Ferb shrugged. "What can I say; there is a certain beauty to a well-mounted anti-air gun."

The voice of the computer lady came out of the dog. "Honestly, you're lucky to be alive. The last time I saw a non-Spartan take on a Brute like that, they got torn to pieces."

Buford grinned under his helmet. "Ah, he wasn't so tough. Now that squid I fought that one time, that was…"

As he was speaking, a Covenant Engineer chose to poke its head off of the side of the dog. It had already fixed the cybernetic dog as much as possible, and now it was curious as to what the new voice was.

Ferb turned to it and quickly started to make the complex motions with his hands that the Engineers used as a language. _Don't worry,_ he said. _Buford here's a friend._

Buford's eyes slowly widened. "AAAAUUUUUGGGHHH!" he screamed. Then, the toughest bully in town who had just beaten a Brute with nothing more than a drop shield and his bare hands went running home as fast as the armor could take him.


End file.
